The networks will play a variety of pop hits during their TV upfront presentations next month, but the only song that really should be part of the soundtrack that is The Lego Movie’s “Everything is Awesome.” After all, each of the the network executives who take the stage will be full of optimism that their new crop of shows will finally be the ones that take them to the top.

But as I wrote at Adweek, everything is not awesome, even for the top network in adults 18-49 (which will again be ABC). Before we hear a new batch of (at least partially) empty upfronts promises, I looked back at the five worst predictions from last year’s presentations. Among them: then Fox Entertainment president Kevin Reilly’s declaration that Jump of the Century and Hieroglyph will be airing soon on the network:

Reilly was far from the only one to disappear from Fox shortly after the upfronts. He touted two programs to advertisers that were canceled before they ever made it to air: straight-to-series pickup Hieroglyph (Fox pulled the plug a month later) and Jump of the Century, in which two rival stuntmen would attempt Evel Knievel’s failed jump across Idaho’s Snake River Canyon (it was scrapped last July). “The power of broadcast really shines through when there’s urgency to view,” Reilly said of Jump of the Century. Of course, it also really shines through when the shows are actually broadcast.

There’s a lot more silly predictions where that came from, so sure to read the rest of the story.

5 Predictions From TV Networks Execs Last Year That Were Way Off

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This morning, I appeared on MSNBC to discuss TV’s best and worst of 2014, and was very happy to be alongside Janet Mock for another MSNBC panel about television. While it wasn’t technically a Melissa Harris-Perry show, it aired during her show’s usual time slot and was produced by her team, so it still counts as a MHP appearance in my book. Here’s the video:

The segment was terrific. I only wished they’d mentioned TV & Not TV as they were supposed to (things were a little crazed with breaking news), and that they’d called me the correct name at the end (“Jane Lynch”?). But it was fun to be back on MSNBC, and to discuss the year’s highs and lows one last time.

The best and worst of TV in 2014

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I had so much fun pulling together this story for Adweek, on the most outrageous statements that network presidents made in 2014. As I wrote,

The network presidents spent much of 2014 bragging about, and defending, their various programming and scheduling decisions, no matter how foolish some of them turned out.

But some of those proclamations were so outrageous that they earned a well-deserved spot on this list of the 10 most ridiculous statements network presidents made this year. (I wanted to call this their “10 Biggest Lies of 2014,” but they actually believed at least some of these things to be true at the time they said them.)

From “Mulaney is the next Seinfeld!” to “We love Bill Cosby, and his troubles will sort themselves out,” see how many of your favorites made the list. And if you think Kevin Reilly, who stepped down as Fox entertainment chairman in May, is going to figure prominently … you would be correct.

The 10 Most Ridiculous Things Network Presidents Said in 2014

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I decided against a 10 worst list, because some shows — like Mixology and Manhattan Love Story — were clearly doomed from the start and promptly lived down to expectations. Instead, I’ve focusing on the year’s biggest disappointments: shows (and performers) who aspired to something greater, and perhaps even briefly achieved it, before it all came crashing down. Here is 2014’s Hall of Shame, in alphabetical order:

(Michael Desmond/NBC)

A to Z (NBC)

This sitcom — chronicling the A-to-Z relationship of Ben Feldman and Cristin Milioti —was one of the most promising fall pilots. Its stars had terrific, unforced chemistry. And then … nothing happened, for episodes on end. The jokes evaporated, and no actual stakes ever materialized. And how could a show set at not one but two different workplaces get away with never showing anyone doing actual work? After How I Met Your Mother, I thought the fantastic Milioti had finally found a part worthy of her talents. Better luck next season.

(Robert Voets/NBC)

Bearded best friends 

One of the most depressing developments of the fall season was the discovery that all the networks’ comedy development teams were operating from the exact same bland playbook: don’t forget to cast a bearded best friend! Like a virus, they popped up on almost every sitcom this fall, including Mulaney (Zack Pearlman), A to Z (Henry Zebrowski), Manhattan Love Story (Nicolas Wright) and Marry Me (John Gemberling). Now Gemberling is the last beard standing, not that I could really distinguish him from the other three.

(CBS)

Extant (CBS)

When I reviewed the Extant premiere this summer, I was excited about the sci-fi drama’s possibilities, both in storyline and the performance it was coaxing out of star Halle Berry, as an astronaut who returns from a lengthy solo mission to discover that she’s pregnant. A few episodes later, those optimistic dreams were the opposite of extant. Instead of learning its lessons from Under the Dome, which quickly squandered its beguiling premise in 2013, CBS repeated them all again.

(Ron P. Jaffe/Fox)

How I Met Your Mother finale (CBS)

While I was never a regular How I Met Your Mother watcher, I had been eagerly anticipating how series would pay off the story it had been setting up for nine (!) seasons. Instead, the finale confirmed everyone’s worst fears — that the Mother (Milioti again!) had died — and turned into How I Barely Met Your Mother. It was a legen — wait for it! — dary addition to the annals of all-time worst finales. (Make room, Dexter!)

(Ray Mickshaw/FOX)

Mulaney (Fox)

Out of all this year’s new sitcoms, I was most excited about seeing Mulaney, created by and starring one of SNL’s all-time great writers (and the man behind Stefon!), John Mulaney. And then I watched the first episode Fox made available, which was…awful. Soon after, Fox shared four more episodes, each one more depressing than the last. How could someone so innovative end up in something so conventional? Even worse, the show completely wasted its fantastic cast (including Martin Short and the underrated Nasim Pedrad).

(Fox)

Rake (Fox)

A year after Fox had scored big with a midseason drama featuring a movie star (Kevin Bacon’s The Following), it tried again with this Greg Kinnear legal series — and failed spectacularly. Billed as the law version of House, it lacked any of that show’s zest and wit. Kinnear’s Keegan Deane was less an anti-hero than an anti-character, as clunky a fit as the show’s silly title.

(Fred Norris/FOX)

Sleepy Hollow (Fox)

It’s the hat trick of Fox disappointments! Season 1 the Fox supernatural series was a delightful, wackadoodle wonder. And that’s what has made Season 2 so upsetting, as the series has undone so much of what made it addictive in the first place. John Noble, so vital to the end of Season 1, has been neutered this year, while Orlando Jones was stuck on the sidelines. There are still flashes of the trippy show that once was (and Tom Mison and Nicole Beharie remain terrific), but Sleepy Hollow suffered the biggest quality dropoff this year.

(Antony Platt/AMC)

Turn (AMC)

So intriguing in theory, so bland in execution. Still flailing post-Breaking Bad, AMC came up empty again with this uninspired Revolutionary War drama. It was somehow renewed for Season 2, and saddled with a longer title: Turn: Washington’s Spies. There, problem solved!

(Patrick Harbron/FX)

Tyrant (FX)

FX’s incredible run of essential dramas came to an end with this controversial Middle Eastern series, which finally offered one antihero too many for a network packed with them. And no, don’t remind me that this was renewed over the far-superior The Bridge.

(Virginia Sherwood/NBC)

Christopher Walken (Peter Pan Live!)

Two weeks later, I still can’t believe what I saw on Dec. 4. Walken’s Captain Hook was supposed to save Peter Pan Live! Instead, he almost sunk the show. That an actor who is so reliably riveting in everything he appears in — no matter how great or lousy the project itself is — could sleepwalk through a three-hour live performance was one of the year’s biggest stunners. Whether it was due to age or boredom, Walken lost a big chunk of his luster that night.

That was cathartic; now it’s time to praise television again! Check back Thursday for more 2014 TV VIPs.

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In less than two months, Fox’s fall has turned downright cataclysmic, as four of its five new series have already tanked. As I wrote at Adweek,

So the network is turning to an unlikely source to salvage its terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad fall season: a bunch of kid chefs.

That would be tonight’s premiere of MasterChef Junior, which has suddenly become Fox’s Hail Mary play for sweeps. I also spoke with one of the show’s judges, Joe Bastianich, who told me why the show is up for the challenge.

Can MasterChef Junior Help Fox Salvage What’s Left of the Fall?

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Step aside, TGIF and Must-See TV: branded nights of TV are back again, thanks to ABC’s #TGIT (Thank God It’s Thursday) and NBC’s #WomanCrushWednesday. As I wrote at Adweek:

Networks can’t resist cloning anything that’s a hit on television, whether that’s shows or campaigns. Given the success of both #TGIT and #WCW, they’re all likely brainstorming hashtag-friendly campaigns in an effort to brand as many other nights of TV as possible.

So I came up with 12 new TV hashtag campaigns I’d like to see, from #PTSD (Post-Traumatic Sports Delay) to #TGINTGIF (Thank God It’s Not TGIF) to #WhatsaHashtag (What’s a Hashtag? Mondays).

After #TGIT and #WCW, 12 New TV Hashtag Campaigns We’d Like to See

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On Friday, Oct. 24, ABC finally put Manhattan Love Story out of its misery, making it fall’s first canceled new series. It’s the longest we’ve gone into the fall season without a cancellation since 2003, when Fox waited until Oct. 28 to pull the plug on Luis, after five episodes.

At Adweek, I explain why the networks were so patient this fall:

“The growing truth is that picking winners today isn’t as simple as looking at the overnight ratings,” CBS Entertainment chairman Nina Tassler said this summer. And unlike last year, when the networks paid that idea lip service but still quickly moved to cancel several low-rated shows, they’ve actually been practicing what they preach.

Tying in to that Adweek story, I also compiled the first shows to be canceled each fall since 2000 — along with what day they were canceled, and how many episodes had aired — which I was surprised to find that no one else had done previously. (Especially for the earlier shows, that information was tougher to dig up than I had anticipated.) Relive the members of TV’s least prestigious club, from Tucker to Do Not Disturb to (sniff) Lone Star to Lucky 7.

Why It Took So Long for ABC to Cancel ‘Manhattan Love Story’

TV’s Worst Prime-Time Debuts, From 2000 to Present

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Every once in a while, one of my random tweets blossoms into its own story. That’s what happened during TCA summer tour, when I tweeted this during the panel for Mulaney, in which Nasim Pedrad talked about leaving Saturday Night Live to do the Fox sitcom.

I will miss Nasim Pedrad’s Kim Kardashian on SNL, which is the only acceptable version of Kim Kardashian on TV. #TCA14

— Jason Lynch (@jasonlynch) July 20, 2014

I spoke with Pedrad later that day (she’d seen the tweet and loved it), and she talked about her Kim Kardashian impression, and mentioned that she would be open to popping up on SNL on occasion to perform it.

With SNL’s season premiere this weekend, the time seemed right to write this Daily Beast analysis of Pedrad’s exit (which was largely overlooked this summer amidst all the other firings and hirings), and how much she — and her Kim impersonation — will be missed. As I wrote,

For better or for worse—okay, for much worse—and in the face of all 15-minutes-of-fame logic, Kim Kardashian isn’t going anywhere, even after seven years in the spotlight. We’re still stuck seeing the reality star plastered on every tabloid cover, starring in endless iterations of Keeping Up with the Kardashians, and instagramming and tweeting as if her life depended on it. Pedrad’s take on Kim has been our reward for having to put up with the real thing, and the only acceptable version of Kim Kardashian on television.

It’s also deceptively nuanced. Anyone could simply play Kim as a dim bulb. (Both Vanessa Bayer and Cecily Strong’s impressions of the other two Kardashian sisters—Kourtney and Khloe, respectively—are cut from the same cloth as their recurring “not-porn-stars-anymore” commercial models.) But Pedrad brought more layers to the role than even Kim herself actually has.

With no logical choices in the current cast to impersonate Kim, here’s hoping that SNL does the smart thing and brings back Pedrad for the occasional “Waking Up with Kimye” sketch. She’s the only Kardashian worth Keeping Up with.

SNL’s Kim Kardashian Konundrum: Why Nasim Pedrad’s Exit Hurts So Much

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